Thursday, May 20, 2010

Duck-Lipped Disasters, Heidi Montag and Make-Up Free Monday

Thank goodness reality television has nothing to do with reality, or somewhere between applying spray-tans to four-year old girls and giving a burglar to the stars a T.V. show, I would be convinced that the entire world has lost its mind. Wait a second -- these things REALLY happened? WTF? My reality check just bounced through the ceiling.

As if that "reality" wasn't bad enough, now a movement has been started called "Make-Up Free Monday". Seems young women across the continent are suffering from "poor body image". Kathie Lee Gifford, in an effort to cook-up something to fill time on the "Today Show", decided to BRAVELY appear with co-host Hoda Kotb (drum roll) without make-up. The horror. For some reason this all has to do with Heidi Montag looking like a duck-billed, balloon-boobed Barbie Doll. Kathie Lee went on and on, as only she can, about how hard it was to appear au natural on national T.V. (And I guess that red is Kathie's natural hair color, too.) I hate to be a voice of reason in the middle of all this posturing and concern over poor body image in young women, but it seems to me that Heidi Montag's TEN plastic surgeries at one time, compared to the use of something with the temporary and fleeting quality of make-up, is a little, eh-hem, extreme.

Now my husband tells me there is a push for something called "Make-Up Free Monday". Swell. As if Monday doesn't suck enough, now we are supposed to face it without lipstick. Has everyone lost their minds? Jessica Simpson and Kim Kardashian removed their make-up for several magazine stories. If I looked like either Jessica Simpson or Kim Kardashian I'd walk around butt-naked all the time. As it is, I prefer clothes because I just look better that way. Trust me. I look better with highlights, too. Heidi Montag is the best advertisement against excessive plastic surgery I have ever seen. I think everyone is not thinking about how great Heidi looks, but rather: What sort of hack doctor would do this to a young, beautiful woman? She went from looking pretty to looking pretty weird. There is a rather casual attitude that T.V. shows like "Extreme Makeover" take towards plastic surgery that is disturbing. But make-up???? Plastic surgery is not the same thing as make-up. I have never had to go under anesthesia to apply mascara, have you?

So I am passing on "Make-Up Free Monday". I prefer "Tiara Tuesdays" any way.


  1. No one can take away MY make-up from me! Especially on a monday!

  2. make-up free monday is cruel on many many levels. I am so glad I missed the Kathy Lee and Hooda nonsense. I am looking forward to them being mocked on SNL however.

  3. Believe me, they were asking for a parody. Appearing without make-up is not brave and covering their own made-up news story for a week was neither brave, nor newsworthy. When I run around without make-up I am just being lazy, O.K.?

  4. I'm so ahead of the game. I don't even wear make up on a daily basis, I can skip Mondays without even realizing it.